Loneliness

Posted on Thu Sep 28th, 2023 @ 4:56pm by First Lieutenant Bethany Harrison

Mission: HYDRA: Another Head Rises
Location: Bethany's House
Timeline: Present Day

OG’s digital eyes popped open suddenly, as a map materialized in the air in front of her holographic form, zooming in on a familiar spot in Oklahoma. A red light and a less than silent alarm sounded in the centralized control room, and the mortals that were tasked with individual monitoring glanced up from their personal screens. They had lost tracking on one of their charges. This was a normal game with them, this pair of headaches having pulled this disappearing act more than once.

Fractal much preferred to work in the shadows, and Julius was more than happy to oblige his User’s whims, for the most part. The problem with the bonded nano was that they were truly sentient, and oftentimes their bond with their mortal became something more than simply a relationship between the AI and their User.

Their pairing had not been an easy one to start off with, the bonding taking the full three days, as she was a particularly resilient, resistant, mortal. However, their bond had become one that was almost unheard of, a true symbiosis that had evolved over their time together, making them a truly skilled and deadly duo.

When they pulled these stunts, the team knew that something was about to go down. They would usually send a known signal at various intervals just to let the team know that they were still alive. While those signals weren’t always at the same time, they did have a number of patterns that they utilized. It was just a matter of time to be able to figure out which one they were employing, and it was a waiting game that tended to set their minders on edge.

This time there was no advanced warning, no battle plan in place, which was concerning. After a quick search, OG found no record of any upcoming actions, and something just...felt off. The academy’s digital overseer sent a message to their headmistress, and recommended ordering their primary team into standby, as well as contacting the mountain man to see if they were missing something.

Before the white-coated tech at their monitor could fully turn to face their ever-present central AI, OG said, “I know. Fractal and Julius have gone dark. Again. Start the timer and monitor for updates.”

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After her fight with Talon, Bethany had gone home. Her intent was to grab her go bag and the Jeep, and be gone within a few minutes. There was a job that needed to be done, and she couldn’t sit around on her hands. Still, she found herself standing in front of the door to her house, trying to force herself to walk in.

After a few minutes, and a deep, heavy sigh, the young woman walked in and tried to go to the closet where their gear was stored. Well, if she was honest, there was gear stored all over the house, having known that their lives were volatile and one never knew when things would go to hell.

While she turned on no lights, she was still able to see just as well, and she kept seeing the paintings of her and Jon, smiling, close...happy. Each one was carefully hand-painted by Cecily, in excruciating detail. Every step made her heart ache more and more, memories flooding over her current thoughts, and the weight of how empty the house felt began to feel like it was crushing her. Bethany began turning the paintings, or laying them down, as she passed, her heart unable to take the constant barrage of sorrow that came from seeing his beautiful face, his craggy, lopsided smile, his stunning azure-streaked eyes.

Forcing herself forward, she came to the closet where they tended to keep their go-bags, and actually groaned when she realized that she hadn’t even had time to re-sort it after everything that had happened. She hadn’t been home for months until just a few weeks earlier, unable to bring herself there until Matty had been assigned to her and needed a place to live.

This was the house where they had been building their dreams, and now every shadow, every dark corner, seemed like something out of a nightmare. The young light-bearer pushed down the pained gag that wanted to rise up in the back of her throat, knowing that she’d lose it if she kept thinking about it, and she wanted to be gone before Dyami came looking for her.

She turned and took the stairs two at a time, knowing exactly where the things were that she needed. Going through hidden drawers and opening secret panels, Bethany gathered weapons and ammunition, medical supplies, as well as a few other useful things. Then she turned, going through the motions of the mission prep, and stopped in front of their shared bedroom, everything slipping from her hands as her body seemed to go numb.

Blindly stepping over the gear at her feet, she slowly walked into their room. A chill swept over her as she forced herself past their bed and to the closet, knowing that she had to get something, but that thought had become secondary to the gnawing pain that she had never felt before. The last time she had felt anything remotely like the emptiness that was threatening to consume her, was after her mama had died. But this was so much different somehow.

Bethany had been in a haze the last time that she had opened the closet, gathering things for Jon as though preparing him for his funeral. When she finally managed to pull the accordion door open, her emerald gaze landed on one of his suits, and she reached out to run her hand down the expensive sleeve.

She had a few nice things, mainly things that Jon had bought for her, since she had no sense of fashion and tended to wear clothing that was more utilitarian. However, Jon was bespoke, not liking anything to appear out of place, and his wardrobe had always been something that she was in awe of. Having grown up around dingy, dirty men, seeing nothing but the worst that mankind had to offer, Jon had been an enigma to her.

Clean cut, dapper, always calm and put together, Jon truly was her exact opposite. The balancing force to her chaotic nature. His was the calming voice that could cut through the cacophony of madness that sometimes dragged her down in the midst of that chaos. What was she supposed to do without that voice? Without that calm, loving hand that always pulled her back when things got bad?

That crushing sense of loneliness swept over her again, leaving her feeling cold and numb as her fingers caressed the fine linen of one of his dress shirts. Tears rolled down her face as she thought of never feeling his strong arms around her again, or one of those gentle kisses on her forehead that made her feel so safe and secure.

Jon had been the only man that Bethany had ever loved, or even desired. He had taught her so much about a world that she knew nothing about, and understood things about her that no one else could. She gasped sharply at the thought of never sharing another meal with him, of never seeing him laugh, like the first time she had cut his hair and hadn’t gotten it quite right.

The young woman’s tears kept falling, her thoughts becoming more manic, absently walking backwards until she sat down hard on the bed. She gasped again at the memory of the first time that she held a straight razor to his throat to shave him. It was a simple task, a loving one, and a show of trust that meant more to her than he could have ever known.

Bethany’s entire body shuddered at the thought of never seeing that hungry look in his piercing eyes, and feeling the burning desire that he held for her. She realized just how much she longed for his gentle caresses, his rough, eager kisses. How she craved his passionate lovemaking, and falling asleep, contented, her head on his chest, his arm around her protectively.

In that moment of utter and abject loneliness, she broke. Curling up on the bed that she had shared with her partner, her confidant, her only love, she clutched his pillow to her and wept until a fitful, torturous sleep overwhelmed her.

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FIN

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Bethany Harrison
Fractal
Mutant Underground